7. Make the first move.
A recent study at the University of Virginia found that the leading predictor of a woman’s marital happiness was the level of her husband’s emotional engagement. If you two are spending quality time together, you’re happy. But when you’re feeling disconnected, your relationship and your sex life suffer. Here’s why: You need to feel close to him to be inspired to make love, and he often needs sex to feel close to you, explains Berman. How to break the stalemate? Make the first move, says Berman. “Do something simple like thanking him for taking out the trash. When you give him a little gratitude, it’s a huge bonding moment for him.” In response, he’ll start tuning back in to what you need, and you’ll be much more likely to want him in return.